Now, when you get to a certain age,
Consider one thing, as you turn your page.
Before you walk out of your front door,
You maybe have been a minute before,
But pay a wee visit just once more;
You never know what trouble may lay in store!
Meticulous planning of your journey's end,
Root cause analysis for the time you'll spend,
On roads, on paths, as you make your way;
Loose change in pockets, if you have to pay.
A tissue for your nose, or if caught short,
Handy to have on hand, you'll be glad you brought!
No room for paralysis, as we think you'll see,
Local analysis if you need to wee.
Pointers, plan and reconnoitre,
Obviously outside loos please don't loiter,
And you'll save yourself a lot of bother
If you also learn rules on how to hover!
Limited proximity to certain perimeters,
Could be seen as enjoyment limiter.
Make sure you stay within a waddling range,
Ignore onlookers, cross legged and strange.
Equidistant from the public loo,
Toilet convenience be on hand for you.
There are now more things that you must not trust,
Trapped wind, maybe not merely a gust
A rain shower today was not forecast,
Spending a penny, will you be outcast?
To combat a gust or a mighty blast.
Quick where's the toilet, I need one fast!
Never ever ever, just pass one by,
Passing a toilet, like a sinful lie.
Always pay a visit, you'll be relieved,
Better to give in, than to receive
A shock, so quickly, unlock and howl:
Revenge movement of my mistrusting bowel!
You may think that you have mental strength,
The bladder of an ox, go for any length,
But never ride past because as you do,
Voice in your head says, "I need the loo"
Advice I hope that you'll take on board,
As you crave and visit the great outdoors.
You reach for the skies, urethra reminds,
Listen to your bladder and please be kind.
If you have to go, best never say no.
Find a bush and squat down low.
Not a wedding vow, but yes I do!
Any ideas where's the nearest loo?
