E by Gum from the banks of the Humber,
By eck from the outskirts of ezzle;
From t city of culture down t M62,
Upt A19 for t embezzling few!
We've to mind us P's, as well as us Qs,
Elaine ' s watchful eye ensures that we do;
Talk proper, talk right, talk Yorkshire sense,
Casting and planning she was immense.
Attention t detail, where is her medal?
Don't recall ever, spool missin from treddle:
A Fish splice, some dancing,
Some mincing of meat,
Encouragement for all, for them with left feet.
So much enjoyment, she put in such graft.
Lots of rescheduling, my how we laughed.
Coping wi holidays, and them not around,
Commitments for some, how others would frown!
But not sweet director, she coped wi first time,
Int head Tony Christie, spinning them lines,
Great fun we're the winners! My what a blast!
A big ta to Elaine a fine Yorkshire las!
And when propper trouble down at the mill
Shelley's voice left her she had to back fill
Took to the stage like the natural she is
My show must go on it's the name of show biz!
Hope she'll relax, don't want us missin or craving,
Holiday perhaps in Patrington Haven.
Take in a classic, maybe George Elliot,
(Trans-gender novelist believe it or not!)
Out in her garden, no more watching telly,
Fully equipped in toe capped white wellies;
Blue net to wear, keeps hair in its places;
A trip down to Sandown place bet on some races.
A night on the town, down at Cindarellas,
Surrounded by silks and effeminate fellas;
Forget all them lines and that planning balony,
Extra cheese please on quattro stagioni!
All roads they are leading this way Ammarillo,
Elaine's head we hope now hitting that pillow,
An end to them nightmares, farewell haunting screams
Magnificent job done no more broken dreams.
So if tha's a drink that's preferably tea,
Raise it up now to say toast with me:
You are the greatest, this play highly ranks;
To dearest Elaine, seriously though, thanks!
